kel023
Junior Member
Posts: 88
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Post by kel023 on Dec 27, 2010 21:34:34 GMT -5
Hi Ladies,
I have a question I'm hoping ANYONE can help me with. I found myself being asked 1,000 times over this past weekend "So, when do you guys plan on trying again?". It seemed to be the question of the week. I didn't want people to know that we ARE trying b/c I don't want the pressure of people knowing. So instead I would respond "when we are ready" and hope that they would leave me alone about it. It didn't stop there though. Then they'd say "well, when is that? Is that going to be soon?" Lets just say that some of our family members are very persistent and nosey. For the most part, I would just laugh it off and try to change the subject (even though inside I was pissed b/c I thought they were overstepping their boundaries). In a few instances though, I caved and told them that we were going to start trying soon (I just wanted the questioning to stop at that point). So, now I feel exactly how I didn't want to.......pressured.
Did this happen to any of you?? What did you say everyone to politely let them know to BACK OFF?
Kelly
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Post by carlsangel on Dec 27, 2010 22:55:18 GMT -5
Hi Kelly, I'm sorry you are going through this. It seems really insensitive for people to be putting pressure on you like this. Maybe you could respond with something like " we have a lot of healing to do", or "not until we are ready". If they persist, just tell them you can't give that answer right now. I wouldn't worry about stepping in toes, because they obviously arent worried about that. I wish you the best on your TTC journey! Hugs! ~Hannah~
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Post by meeko08(Lisa) on Dec 28, 2010 0:36:54 GMT -5
I was just told people that I didn't want to talk about it and that usually ended the conversation if saying when we are ready didn't stop them. My opinion was that if they were rude enough to keep asking then there was no reason I couldn't be rude back. I even told one of my Aunts that wouldn't let it go that she was being very rude. I don't know if that helps you but you shouldn't feel pressured to share something so private if you don't want to.
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kel023
Junior Member
Posts: 88
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Post by kel023 on Dec 28, 2010 14:06:48 GMT -5
Thanks Hannah and Lisa. We're getting together with them again tonight so if it's brought up again I'll try those suggestions out. I think the main problem is that it's not my family, it's my DH's family so I feel the need to be more polite with them. My DH has tried to take care of the situation to no avail so looks like I'm just going to have to get a little more blunt with them. Wish me luck!
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Post by parissian on Dec 28, 2010 21:20:13 GMT -5
I've had people ask if I will have another child..and my answer has been, "if "god" allows it" or like "i'll leave it to the hands of god"...with a smirky smile.....I hate when people ask when I'm trying because believe or not some people are so rude that if we answer we have been trying or we are trying...they will actually calculte how long you been trying...these people are just pathetic...
so i just leave it to a whishy answer...
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Post by daffylexer on Dec 30, 2010 10:21:59 GMT -5
As good old Dear Abby would say, turn it back on them and ask why they want to know. People are usually so shocked by you asking them in a very polite manner why they're so nosey that they usually drop the subject.
Alexa
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