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Post by 284aimee on May 21, 2010 7:51:42 GMT -5
i found out 2 days ago i have a B/O... today would be 14 weeks for me. My dr said if nothing passes by today then to call her. I have to call her but don't know what to say. I wanted to take the pill option, but am nervous that i am not making the right decision. I am affrid of the D/C route as well. what would be the best option for me at this point??? 14 weeks is quite a long way for it to have not passed on its own don't you think?
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Post by Lauren on May 21, 2010 8:21:17 GMT -5
First, let me say how terribly sorry I am for your loss. It is terrible that it took so long for you to find out. It is a huge loss, and I know how hard it is to accept the fact that your baby is gone. I would strongly recommend that you go for a D&C. At 14 weeks, even the pill option will be very frightening. I have never personally taken it, but have had friends and people on this board take it, and they often end up in the Er because there is just so much blood. I have had 3 D&C's, and can honestly tell you that they are quite painless. You will be under anesthesia for the procedure, and then will wan tto go home and take it easy, but by the next day you should be physically back to normal. The hormonal crash after a miscarriage can take much longer, but I think at 14 weeks it is really your best option.
Please lean on the women on this board. We have all been through it and know the pain you are feeling. THinking of you, Lauren
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Post by lfischer on May 21, 2010 8:40:05 GMT -5
I am so very sorry for your loss. You have found a wonderful place of support.
I would agree with Lauren that the D&C at this point would be the safest option. I had a D&C at a little over 11 weeks. I was also scared of the procedure, but it was very easy physically. I was able to go to my daughter's volleyball tournament the next day.
Please know that we are here for you every step of the way.
Hugs~ Leah
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Post by 284aimee on May 21, 2010 9:18:17 GMT -5
thx girls for the support. i know at 14 weeks i thought i was in the safe zone.... entering the second trimester and then found this out.... it was my first time pregnant, and my husband and i were really looking forward to having him/her. i feel that it was a total dissapointment.... i am still trying to deal with the fact that i am no longer pregnant. 14 weeks is quite far along..... i thought the whole time i was hearing the babys heartbeat with my doppler, but as it turns out it was my own along with placenta swishing sounds. not the babies at all
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Post by 284aimee on May 21, 2010 9:36:47 GMT -5
i just got off the phone with my dr's secretary.... told her i will do the D & C. now i am waiting for her to call back with the appt. i have a question though..... could i be infected right now with the sac still inside me for so long??? i get cramps, nothing more than period cramps though... and no fever or anything. I feel fine (pysically) should i be worried?
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Post by 284aimee on May 21, 2010 13:31:00 GMT -5
so my dr. called me back and said that she called in for my apt for the d&c, but the specialist there told her that i should wait it out another week. the sac measured 8 weeks, and no baby in it at all. which of course is B/O. but she said since the sac was 8 weeks, then it would be safe to pass natural. i guess an empty sac will never stay in the body longer than 2 months, and since i am so far along it wouldnt hurt to wait the last week out. what do you think? my hcg or hgc? levels are at 25 still.......and she will do another blood test and ultrasound tue..... what do you think???
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Post by lfischer on May 21, 2010 15:10:34 GMT -5
I definitely do not want to scare you, but for some women on the board who have chosen to miscarry naturally, it was not the size of the sac but the loss of blood that was more of the issue. With that being said, every experience is different. The general rule of them has always been that if you are soaking more than one pad an hour, you should go to the emergency room. Also, I would have something on hand for the pain. Some other advise that women have given is to not be alone. If you should need more care, someone would be there to help.
Also, if the diagnosis is unsure, then the second u/s and blood draw are important.
Big hugs~
Leah
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Post by 284aimee on May 21, 2010 15:26:04 GMT -5
hoping my hubby will be here when it does happen.... she said to wait a week and hopefully it would pass by then. is the blood loss really that bad? or is it just more than some have expected? i am nervous about letting it pass on its own but she said to wait...... this is a really terrible situation that i am in....... i just hope it turns out ok.
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Post by meeko08(Lisa) on May 22, 2010 0:38:43 GMT -5
I am so sorry for your loss. I had two losses after 12wks for one I had a D&C and the other I took meds. With the meds there was alot of bleeding but it was over quick. If you decide to go the natural method or with the meds I would get something for the pain as there is alot of cramping. With the D&C I was physically fine the next day. It is so hard making these decisions when it all feels so unreal still. Take care of yourself and keep us updated on how you are doing. We are here for you if you need us. The ladies here were such a great help to me through everything.
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Post by 284aimee on May 22, 2010 7:23:01 GMT -5
thx for responding..... mydr doesnt want to give me any pills to pass this..... she says it should all happen on its own in a week or so..... and just to wait it out. my hcg level is 25 and she wants to do another ultrasound tue..... i will let you know how all is going.... thx again for replying, any and all support helps
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Post by carmenivy on May 22, 2010 12:58:59 GMT -5
I am so sorry for your loss. It must be awful to go that long, thinking everything is okay only to find out it isn't. Having a BO is such a shock. I didn't even know what one was until I had one.
My doctor highly recommended a D & C for both my BO and my miscarriage. Both times, my sac was measuring between 8 and 9 weeks, although I was ten weeks along. My doc said that the risk of bleeding excessively was high, and that it was much safer to have a d & c. However, d & c's have risks of their own, and although it's a small risk, you can have uterine scarring that can make it difficult to become pregnant again later. I never had any problems with this, though.
I hope something happens soon, and that it is as easy on you as possible. Then you can start healing emotionally and physically.
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Post by 284aimee on May 28, 2010 6:36:07 GMT -5
SO here i am.... Started bleeding last saturday very lightly. Went in for a U/S wednesday and the sac is still there. Here i am friday, still very lightly bleeding (very lightly). How long does it take for a sac to pass naturally like i am trying to do??? i have not takin anything at all to help this pass since the dr said to wait it out. Any advise would be helpful Thx girls
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Post by Lauren on May 28, 2010 6:43:31 GMT -5
I am sorry to hear that things have not progressed more for you. What does your doctor say in terms of a plan. If you are only bleeding very lightly, then it might not happen naturally. I think you should discuss how long you want to wait it out with your doctor, and make a date for a D&C if it has not happened by then. I think being able to put the physical miscarriage behind you will help you on the road to healing. I know that you want it to happen naturally, but the waiting must be agonizing, plus as others have said when it actually does happen you will not want to be alone. THinking of you, Lauren
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kd
Junior Member
Posts: 31
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Post by kd on May 28, 2010 22:07:58 GMT -5
I am so deeply sorry for your loss.
I want you to know that I can relate to what you are going through. To keep a long story short, at 12 weeks I got a second opinion on what to do about my BO after the first doc said it would pass just like a normal period (which isn't true), he didn't even offer any alternatives.
The second doc encouraged the D&C but said it was up to me and I could wait a while if I wanted to. He said the time the BO took to pass naturally was completely unknown since I had already gone this long with nothing really happening except very slight spotting for two weeks prior. The doc said that the D&C would be mainly for my own peace of mind, to move myself past the miscarriage, and to know what was going to happen and when. I admit I was frightened because everything was happening so quickly and I was alone at the time.
Everyone is different, but the D&C turned out to be the right decision for me, and in hindsight more so because I was alone. Like the other ladies have mentioned it was not a terrible experience physically and I also felt ok later the same day and better the next day with little to no pain or bleeding, although I did sleep quite a bit.
if nothing happens in the next couple of days I think you should discuss more seriously alternatives to waiting with your doctor next week or get a second opinion.
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