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Post by Charlotte on Oct 2, 2005 8:34:00 GMT -5
Hi, I am a new member here. I have had 4 previous pregnancies and have 4 beautiful children that are everything to me. My last AF was Aug. 1st. I was not feeling many symptoms and told my Dr. that something was up. (I had been sick and had taken Leviquin right as my AF was supposed to start. When I was late I panicked and went to my doc) In the short of it, he could find anything and more tests confirmed BO. My hCG reached 8000 and then never budged. I am waiting to miscarry naturally but I am scared. Doc said it shouldn't be bad, I only reached 5wks6days. All my pregnancies are high risk and with complications. I hemorrhaged after my 3rd delivery and am worried that it can happen again. My DH and I were ready to accept another baby even though we are maxed out on all levels (financially,emotionally and space wise in our home). I'm not sure we could have managed another child but,I was up for the challenge. Now I am so sad and confused. I'm trying to accept this but waiting is very hard. We only told 2 other close friends because we thought something was wrong from the get go. Now I have hardly anyone to share my emotions with and they sneak up on me without warning. Doc is very supportive and DH has been so wonderful. My beautiful children are being snapped at by their crazy mother and don't deserve the brunt of my pain. I'm so confused and waiting just sucks. Has anyone had a similar situation with no one to turn to? How long will I have to wait and how bad will the miscarriage be?? Thanks for listening, fourforus
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katiel
Senior Member
Posts: 355
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Post by katiel on Oct 2, 2005 15:24:57 GMT -5
I'm so sorry that you have to go thru this. I opted for the d&c so I can't help you with the natural miscarriage questions. I can only offer you some support. It's all so hard. I know that I was so emotional and irritable both before and after the d&c. There are still times when I feel like one big exposed nerve. You are not the only one. The ladies here are all wonderful and really help. Please visit often and let us know how you're doing.
((((((BIG HUGS)))))) Katie
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Post by vernkatherine on Oct 2, 2005 18:59:14 GMT -5
Charlotte:
I am glad that you found this website, especially since you have such few people to share this with. I don't know how much help I can be, but I had two BOs - both were diagnosted at about 9 weeks. With the first one, I started spotting on a Saturday, had my first appt. on Tuesday, was diagnosed and Wednesday had miscarried and was through with the miscarriage process. I bled for about another week to a week and a half, but I didn't have any cramping after Wednesday. The 2nd one I had no warning signs. I went in for my 1st appt. and was diagnosed. I started spotting the next day and the cramping went on for about 4 days and was fairly intense at times. I bled for about another week and a half after. I don't know if that helps you, but hopefully you won't have to wait until the 9 week mark. Both times I miscarried on my own - no D&C necessary.
Anytime you need or want to vent, please do post here. Everyone is more than willing to listen, respond, and help out when they can. The women here have had all different types of experiences and can answer just about anything.
I wish you the best and please keep us posted.
Katherine
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Post by andee on Oct 2, 2005 23:19:26 GMT -5
I am sorry this happened to you.I was put on methergine.I can't be much help.I just wanted to let you know I care.
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Post by justinsmomma on Oct 3, 2005 7:10:56 GMT -5
Hi there,
I too am sorry you have had to find us. I have had two m/c, one at 8 weeks and one at almost 12. Both times I opted for the D&E and never had to worry about bleeding. I know how difficult the waiting is...I chose not to, especially after the 2nd, so that I didn't have to arrange care for my son incase of an emergency. My thoughts and prayers are with your hun!!!!!! We are here if you need a shoulder to cry on.
Big big HUGS
Kris
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Post by Charlotte on Oct 3, 2005 13:50:12 GMT -5
Thank you all so much for your support!! I was really accepting (so I thought) of what was to come of this pregnancy. If we were to have a 5th child, we were going to make it work for our family. If it was not going to happen, I had a lot of peace about that too. Then when I was diagnosed, I saw 'miscarriage' written on the report with all my other follow up blood work orders and I fell apart. I have been really surprised by the pain. I thought I was going to be able to accept it well. I felt so much better after posting here. I can't tell you what a relief it has been to just put my emotions in writing. Just to get it out. I think when I am tired that's when my emotions show up the most. The other night when we went to bed, I was in a perfectly 'normal' state of mind and could hold a conversation perfectly but, I couldn't stop the tears. They poured down my cheeks no matter what I said or did. It was like my body was defying me. It was screaming "GREIVE!!!!" and I wasn't allowing it so, it forced me to deal with it some how. I think right now I'm in a little better frame of mind however I'm terrified of actually bleeding. I have to have my blood drawn for tests and have to see my dr. again on Friday. I'll have more info then, not sure if or how I'm gonna handle going back to the office but, we'll see. Thank you thank you thank you all for listening and understanding. Charlotte
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Post by kurby68 on Oct 3, 2005 18:43:11 GMT -5
Charlotte
I am so sorry for the pain you are enduring as well as the pain you have had to deal with. I had my bo over a year ago and time is the key to healing. And the support of these women and putting your emotions on these posts really does help. I m/c naturally and for me it was not that bad, but I know others have had more of hard time.
I hope that it happens soon and that you can move on with the healing process.
(((((((((hugs)))))))))))00
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Post by ssandy on Oct 4, 2005 3:29:22 GMT -5
I too am waiting and have only told one person about my loss. It is a very sad and lonely time.
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Post by missjenngirl on Oct 4, 2005 14:41:45 GMT -5
hi there, let me first tell you I am very sorry to have heard about your loss. I found out about my BO a month ago tomorrow. I was sent home to wait..... The week that I waited was the hardest part. I finally asked for medication to bring on the miscarriage. I took meds on wednesday, I miscarried that night, and I continued to miscarry for 3 days I actually have full blown contractions, they were not cool! The motrin did help but I had to wait for it to take effect. and then i had to keep taking it. If i knew then what i knon now, I may have opted for a D & C right away, or at least take the meds right away. I lost enough blood that I started to go into shock. and although I ended up not needing a D& C I might have gone through the whole process and still needed one. my hormones are finially at 0, but I am no an emotional wreck (I was fine for 3 weeks) It's bad enough that my doctor is putting me on zoloft for a while. I hope this will help to answer your questions this board and the people here have been a great comfort for me I hope you find it the same. jen
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Post by Charlotte on Oct 6, 2005 16:05:40 GMT -5
Thank you everyone!! It is so comforting to meet people with shared experience--too bad it's such a crummy way to meet. You have all helped me deal with this better than I would have on my own. I am still waiting (today is a week) and have had some cramps but nothing more than a smear of pink. Last night I thought I was going to start but didn't. It seems like if I take Motrin for pain then all the pain and cramps end. I'll see my dr. tomorrow. Will let you know more then. Thanks bunches!! Charlotte feeling much better every day.
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Post by Charlotte on Oct 8, 2005 8:13:58 GMT -5
Update for you all... Missed my appointment Friday because my daughter was sick and all my friends, who could watch her and my son, are pregnant. I did call and was told that my hCG only dropped from 8400 to 8054. They were expecting a much larger drop. I have reschedualed for Wednesday to talk to Doc. However; I started cramping a few hours later. I started to spot a little too and by evening I had terrible back pain. When the back pain hit I stopped spotting ,which was really confusing to me. I had nothing all night and was able to sleep well. This morning has only brought stomach pain and nausea. Now after a few hours of being up and moving around the back pain and spotting have returned. This just stinks!!! We are supposed to be out of town this weekend but, I don't feel up to packing or anything. I am trying not to let this paralyze my daily life and I have 4 kids to tend to while DH is at work. I think that if I keep carrying on like normal, it will make things easier. Any suggestions??? Really just feel like going back to bed for... ohhhhh.... about a week. I am snapping at everybody and then apoligizing for over reacting to everything. I know that this is just all hormones but, does my whole family have to suffer through them too?
Thanks again for listening. You wouldn't believe how much better I feel after posting here.
Charlotte
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Post by vernkatherine on Oct 8, 2005 9:42:20 GMT -5
Charlotte:
If your family knows what you're going through then I'm sure they must understand about the snapping. You are aware of it so I'm sure you're doing everything in your power to control how frequently you snap at them. Sometimes it just happens. I hope this ends soon for you. I'm glad you feel better after posting here.
You're in my thoughts & prayers!
Katherine
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Post by andee on Oct 8, 2005 9:57:27 GMT -5
I hope you feel better soon.I know this is hard.I didn't go natural,I took methergine to help the process,but it still was hard.I was crying and yelling a lot.I don't remember all the stages of greif,but I think anger is one of them.It's only natural.
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Post by kurby68 on Oct 8, 2005 15:59:21 GMT -5
Charlotte
I am so sorry thhat it seems to be making every part of your life insane... I do know that your family will understand and love you. You have every right to feel whatever you are feeling.
(((((((((((hugs)))))))))))
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Post by Blighted Ovum Board Admin on Oct 16, 2005 15:35:01 GMT -5
Charlotte, I was thinking of you and hope you are doing ok. Keep us posted.
**hugs** Lin
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Post by Charlotte on Oct 16, 2005 18:51:54 GMT -5
I go tomorrow to have more blood work to determine the extent of the blood clotting disorder that they have found with all the follow up blood work that was ordered after my m/c. My cramping has pretty much stopped although I wish I could get some direction on bleeding though. It is kind of on again off again. I feel better but have had a rocky weekend. I have been overwhelmed with housework at one point and short with my kids and I've lost my voice. My back is beginning to hurt again tonight and I feel really bloated. I want to get a repeat hCG level tomorrow. I was sitting at 362 on Wed. Hoping that my emotionsal ups and downs are due to levels normalizing. Thanks for asking Lindsy. With all the m/c happening around me it has been quite exhausting month. My other posts have more about this --it's just too much to bring upright now. You have been wonderful support.
Charlotte
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Post by justinsmomma on Oct 16, 2005 19:36:58 GMT -5
Hi Charlotte,
Sorry to hear that you are still struggling. I know its easy to expect that you will be able to go right back to "doing" everything for your family and act like nothing has happened. Emotionally the pain is tremendous when you have to suppress what you are feeling...and now you have the added issue about your blood clotting disorder to worry about. (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I have been down this road. I was dxed after my 2nd b/o with a prothrombin gene mutation. I had to take blood thinners for the entire 9 mos. of my pregnancy this time. I delivered on Wed. and I also hemorrhaged excessively prior to delivery and know how very scary it is.
Please let us know what you find out. We are here for you!
HUGS
Kris
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Post by kurby68 on Oct 16, 2005 19:55:43 GMT -5
Charlotte
Good luck tomorrow. I hope everything is easy to fix.
Keep us posted.
(((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))
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Post by Charlotte on Oct 17, 2005 12:31:00 GMT -5
Kris, I think you and I have the same disorder. It's called MTHFR. It's the prothrombin gene mutation on chromosome 1. I have both markers(one from each parent-I guess) so, I have to take a baby asprin a day for life and deal with pregnancy as it comes. I have hemorrhaged after my third delivery--I soooooooooo empithize with you. It is very scary. My hospital room looked like a crime scene. I understand that yours happened at home--yuck! No housekeeping staff to clean up for you . I'll keep you all posted on my blood levels. Thanks for everything, Charlotte p.s. Kris, enjoy your growing family!!!
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