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Post by tekkitten on Aug 11, 2012 2:51:53 GMT -5
Hello all I am 28 and after waiting years finally decided to have children with the guy I love. It was our first pregnancy. Everything seemed to be going well (LMP May 11). On Wednesday I had my regular Maternity appointment (here we have a clinic that deals with all pregnancies), and had mild brown spotting the night before. They tried to find the hearbeat via doppler, and told me not to worry when they couldnt find it. They sent me to make an u/s appointment, which was scheduled for the 29th. The next day I got fresh blood bleeding, very minor. I went up to emergency, and they did a vaginal exam. Because my uterus was closed, they were not worried, but scheduled me an u/s for today for my "peace of mind." Well, today I went for my u/s, and there was no baby This was a huge blow, as we spent the last 2ish months thinking we were starting our family, only to have it seem like a big lie. I am 12 weeks today, so I'm not sure how big the sac is or anything. I am only having minor brown bleeding now. I kind of want to wait for a natural passing, but I've also read that if its this far along the d and c might be better. I am so scared of surgery though, I have never had any surgery before. Any advice, tips, stories etc would be appreciated. I had never heard of this before, and I am still in a state of shock. I want to try again in a couple months, but I am so scared it will happen again. Thanks <3 Jen
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Post by rita828 on Aug 11, 2012 20:27:58 GMT -5
I am so sorry you are going through this. I, too, had a BO. Mine was at 9.5 weeks. I opted for a D&E. You are right that often the farther along you are the more they encourage surgery. I'm sure others could give you advice on passing it naturally.
I can tell you that my procedure went smoothly. I was out for less than an hour and after waiting in recovery for about an hour or so, I was given the ok to leave. I remember that my legs were sore from being in the stirrups and I had minor cramping but otherwise was ok.
I will tell you, however, that I was in the 2 percent that had complications from the D&E. My cervix closed too soon and trapped the blood/pregnancy remnants in my uterus. I woke up a few days after my D&E and had cramping and heavy bleeding. I went back to the ER and they gave me meds to finish passing everything.
I tell you that not to scare you (again 98% of people don't have any complications) but just to educate you on my experience. If I had to do it all over again I would still opt for the surgery just because I felt like it would be too much agony to wait for things to pass on their own.
Two months after the D&E I started trying again and within 5 months of the D&E I was pregnant again. I gave birth to a baby girl and then 3 months later got pregnant again.
I know right now you probably have little hope but want you to know that most of us go on to have healthy pregnancies. My DH and I tried for 5 yrs to get pregnant before having our B/O. I felt that was my only chance to get pregnant. I now find myself chasing after my 4 yr old and 5 yr old daughters.
Hang in there and know that you are not alone. I will be praying for you.
Anita
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Post by tekkitten on Aug 12, 2012 13:04:00 GMT -5
Thank you Anita. It's nice to hear experiences, even if there are scary elements. It's hard because I feel so alone, and that people don't understand right now. I was super upset Friday when I found out. I went to the hospital yesterday and got confirmation. The specialist here (I live in a small town, so he is always booked up) happened to be in the hospital that day. The lady that checked me in also had a B/O before, so she sent my case to the specialist so he could give his opinion before the emergency doctor looked at it. The emergency doctor that day also happened to be one of the 7 rotating maternity doctors we have here. He was super nice. Both doctors confirmed it, and the specialist is making room for me to see him on Monday, even though he is jam packed booked. Because of the positive hospital visit yesterday, I was feeling better. I didn't cry, looked up fertility stuff online, and generally was feeling positive, if not a little scared (the usual treatment here is the pills, which scare me even more then surgery). However, last night I had dreams about the B/O, and also about having a baby boy that died at 3 months. Now I'm crying again. This sucks so bad, and I feel like no one understands. I just want it to stop hurting
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Post by carlsangel on Aug 13, 2012 6:54:37 GMT -5
I'm so sorry you are going through this! One of the worst things about a miscarriage is the emotional roller coaster. It will be up and down for a while, and just when you think you can handle it, the sadness will hit again. Just give yourself time to grieve and heal...I promise it does get better! My advice would be to get the D&C. I opted to wait with my last B/O and I ended up almost bleeding to death and had to have an emergency D&C anyway. I hope you are able to find peace and healing soon! Hugs & Prayers!!
~Hannah~
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Post by meeko08(Lisa) on Aug 13, 2012 8:38:57 GMT -5
I have had a d&c and used the pills also had very early natural losses. They all have benefits and drawbacks although the d&c was easiest. The roller coaster of emotions is awful and even years later we feel sadness it just gets less overwhelming. The end result is worth it though. I am hoping to start TTC again this month. I was trying in the beginning of the year and was diagnosed with thyroid cancer so I have been waiting for the all clear. Now after one loss before my oldest (9) numerous losses before my second (2.5) I can't wait to try again so have hope this is incredibly hard and emotionally you are going to let yourself feel what you feel along with when you do get pg again it will be scary but once you hold that little person it doesn't seem so bad. (((HUGS)))
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Post by tekkitten on Aug 14, 2012 18:00:15 GMT -5
Thank you so much for your replies <3
I went into the doc yesterday, and he recommended the pills. I think he downplayed just how bad it was going to be so I didn't freak myself out. Well, it was bad. The good part of it was that it was over with quickly. He gave me the pills at 10am, and I ended up passing the sac just before 8pm. The two hours before that were the worst pain I'd ever felt in my life! I have never gone through anything that remotely compares :S
Me and my DB are going to start next week. I know many doctors say wait 3 months, but because this was my body getting rid of it (and the ultrasound shows an all clear) my doctor told me we could start TTC right away.
Thanks again, for the replies and stories. It's hard talking to people that don't truly understand. I'm just glad its all over now <3
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Post by meeko08(Lisa) on Aug 24, 2012 19:26:19 GMT -5
I took pills for my BO and started trying again right away. It took 9 long months but I did get a BFP. I am glad your experience with the pills was OK. I almost bled to death but it was still over quick. I will cross everything I can you get a bfp quickly. Just remember to let yourself heal emotionally at the same time and enjoy the trying
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